by Sydney Vance Pablo/Unsplash House party high, the humid Oklahoma July lurched us into someone else’s one AM dark, some driveway full of cars, echo of empty sound. My menthol cigarette in flame at the wrong end. You handed me another —  the first I ever smoked the whole way. And we talked like friends talk when they smoke anything together outside, in someone’s parents’ garage, backyard, or broken porch swing. My boyfriend doesn’t like me, I confessed bemoaning my own gulli