by Maura Yzmore Luke Pennystan Jesus sat in the booth opposite mine at Denny’s, slowly pouring syrup over a tower of pancakes topped with butter. When he was done, he rotated the plate clockwise, then counterclockwise, only small angles each way, until the orientation was just perfect, with a brief nod completing the ritual. Then he cut out a wedge, tall and slim, and smiled at the skewered syrupy stack like it was the most delightful thing he’d ever seen. By the time he fina

by Maura Yzmore Alexander Dummer I knew the slime was coming, of course I knew, I’d seen the show a bunch of times when I was a kid, and it was always hilarious, and I was always shocked that the slimed were somehow unprepared, like, haven’t you seen the show, what the hell? Didn’t your agent and publicist tell you that you would get slimed? OK, I didn’t think this last thing when I was a kid because I didn’t know about having an agent or a publicist, there was just my mom an